Like a Bird Without a Feather

Summer School

2008-05-25T07:36:00.001-07:00

Summer school is quickly approaching, and I don't look forward to it what-so-ever. Things are going well with Alison and work is crappy as per usual. Not much to really update about. I guess I can say the H. Clinton's refusal to end her campaign and stop knee-capping her own party is frustrating me, but I try to not worry about such things anymore.

Quick update...

2008-05-15T22:22:00.001-07:00

Well, I am no longer a first year law student. Finished up on Tuesday. One year down, two to go. Well two and these summer classes. ugh.

Other news, things seem to be going quite well with the lady. Got snapped on for saying something dumb, which I deserved, but I always feel like such a screw up afterward, much longer than I should. Especially when we were both tipsy. I make it a point to move on when she has, which is rather quickly, but I am used to people bringing stuff up way after the fact, and this girl doesn't operate that way. Its incredible, but odd to have happen at the same time.

I've cut down on my use of the eff bomb quite a bit, which kind of an accomplishment. Yeah, I know, holy crap, I can use a normal vocabulary. Little nervous about my grades, and I ponder every night how life has really turned around for me, but I know its not right to question such gifts.

Life is

2008-04-27T21:21:00.001-07:00

going well still. I'm well on my way for an outline with 7 days left. I got a good study buddy that is great to be around and can focus. Most of the time these two don't go together, and that is what is making this final season not so stressful.

I did learn myself a lesson though. Don't perceive distance in someone for things that don't make sense. The fact you've been sitting at Caribou coffee for 6 hours is probably making
a. you over think random shit, not come up with an answer to what you are thinking, and because you don't come up with an answer you tie yourself in knots just from thinking...(I don't let myself do this over school, why would I now?)
b. they very well may just be exhausted from sitting at Caribou for 6 hours.

Yeah, hopefully I didn't sink my own battleship with my oddness.

Bomb Threat

2008-04-21T18:39:00.001-07:00

at school today, class was only 45 minutes. Wierd. I figure if law students were going to wig out, they already would have at this point.

Life is good right now

2008-04-20T09:36:00.001-07:00

Between a wonderful girl, a trial brief being done, and the semester winding down...I can't really complain about much. I guess the only thing is, with finals coming up, I may be a little stressed and don't really have much time for photography. Which is a real shame, because the weather is rather beautiful.

Update...

2008-04-15T21:31:00.001-07:00

Things seem to be going well, so I'm happy.

My trial brief is ruining my life, and soon afterwards, exams will do the same.

Life isn't bad

2008-04-13T12:41:00.001-07:00

in fact, I'm rather happy with it right now. If you know me well, you'll know why, if you don't then it's probably not that important. But at least you know I'm doing well.

Take care.

Ladies that don't like things being paid

2008-04-08T23:09:00.001-07:00

for by men. I understand the whole independence thing and all. I really do. But I will never have to bear children. I will probably make 30% more for the same work. The least I can do is hold open doors and pick up tabs. Please, don't give me shit about it.

Tommorrow

2008-04-08T14:49:00.001-07:00

Will be a good day.

Hymns for the Hopeless

2008-04-06T13:42:00.001-07:00

Updating from Caribou Coffee after getting some work done for school, but man oh man do I have to clean up my apartment. Bad. I am also updating on my new computer, as I’m a freaking idiot and cracked the screen on that last, and the repair cost was going to be at least $275, buying a refurb screen and installing it myself. So I opted to sell it for $235, hopefully scrap out the RAM for ~$30 and put that towards the debt I just incurred purchasing a new one.

Since my last post, I’ve made some headway on trying to catch up with school, or at least I feel like I have. I need to figure out my summer classes, and get the future straightened up next.

For my Friday night Larc After Dark group, I really need to start spending under $30. Its pretty bullshit that whiskey and soda cost as much as it did anyways.

As far as the girl I spoke of in the last post, just as confused as before, so I have no idea. Not many people have challenged me as much in such a short time, so obviously I'm bedeviled by her.

I’m upset that I boozed up all my money on Friday and didn’t get to go w/ my bud, the esteemed world traveler, John Bathke to BLUES on Halsted last night.

In other news, I have a great urge to plant a garden, but alas, no yard. I’m so glad spring finally seems to be showing its face around here. I miss gravel roads quite a bit these days.

In not my life news, but good news none the less, the Cards aren't off to a bad start, the Chicago Fire look like they might have a decent season, even w/ Osorio leaving, and Fran...ski...whatever the Pole's name is a forward that may be able make good use of Blanco's service to the attack.

Everybody, keep me in check. I'm trying to do so myself, and failing left and right.

Since coming back from sunny San Diego

2008-03-30T13:45:00.001-07:00

First, this cold stuff needs to effing stop.

I've been doing the typical. Work, school, repeat. I've realized after getting my last memo back, I probably need to buckle down a bit more with classes. Word on the street is that most of the class feels the same as me, and they don't give average scores, just the medians. Thusly, it is difficult to judge where you really stand. Upon realizing that fact on Friday, I put on some Godspeed! You Black Emperor and went to the lake front and sat there and watched it darken, as class had gotten out early.

To follow up on my new found needing to buckle down, I went to a Blues bar on Halsted with Nickie. So yea, so far, I fail. I have decided to make my own electric Diddly Bow though.

I kinda like a lady, but as per the usual run of things, I'm keeping my mouth shut. We'll see, but in the end we all know that nothing will happen, because I won't attempt anything, and then I'll get bummed and bitch about it.

San Diego Trip and other stuff.

2008-03-21T20:34:00.001-07:00

San Diego:

Got in about 5pm. Was wonderful. I dug the city immediately, even on a "crappy" day for there. In short, drank every night of the trip, ate 2 monstrous meals per day, went to a St. Paddy's day celebration so intense they cover the streets w/ 60,000 sq. ft. of astroturf and have 2 stages, went to beautiful beaches, saw funny transients, and a lot of hippies. I now hope to move there.

Other Stuff:

Working on a trial brief. Preparing to take 2 classes this summer and possibly the patent bar in the fall, then off to FULL TIME law school with as many hours as them, 9 months more clerking experience, and the patent bar under my belt. Hopefully be on Law Review as well. I will rock.

2008-03-20T15:10:00.000-07:00

Trip to San Diego

Power.

2008-03-09T22:34:00.001-07:00

I've been listening to the blues and folk music a lot lately. I forgot the power that some other stuff can evoke. Mellow is great, but a dose of this kind of stuff is needed to keep the mind sharp.

"You will never outlive the damage done by the mother and the father. Even if you never knew them, they still scar you. . . Ascend. Respect yourself. Embrace true power. Explore the number one. . . . Do not fear life's lie." - H. Rollins

...and the inevitable collapse.

2008-03-04T20:48:00.001-08:00

A while back my sister was in a car wreck. No one in my family called an told me about it till almost two weeks later. My mother didn't tell me for fear of some bullshit reason. My grandmother didn't want to upset me and figured I already knew. I called everyone in my family and let them know, they are to let me know when things "go down" in the family. Logically, are they not going to call me when someone dies for fear of upsetting me?

My mother has been married to a controlling man. Well, she was and then married another one after divorcing the previous one. I thank the Lord I share no genetic material with these men. Anyhow, the first one was so unbearable, that as a child I moved to my grandmothers for a few months. It was bad enough that I don't remember most of my childhood. I fear what happens when the things I've repressed come to light. I only had to put up with the new guy for about a year. I barely made it. I couldn't wait to get out of there. He didn't like me because he couldn't control me. I wasn't female. I wasn't smaller than him. In fact, I was twice his size. He's not a big man.

After 4 or 5 years of abuse, my sister had it. She left and is now at my grand-mothers house. My mother never called and told me. I was upset, but I am not now.

I can't be mad at my mother. I really can only pity her. She seeks men that control her. In the end, they make her depressed. My mother sleeps all the time, has been driven into debt (she'd never owed money till he came along), is depressed, medicated, and self medicating with copious amounts of alcohol. It started with wine, and is apparently vodka, by herself, at the house. I was mad at her when I was younger, now I realize how horrible I must have made her feel, she can't help it anymore than a dog can help sniffing another dog's ass.

I however, can be very mad at the man who didn't let my mother visit me for four fucking years, while I lived only 15 minutes away. Who only let my mother visit me once in the past 6 years. This was only after I went on a huge tirade about how much bullshit it was. This is the man who took my mother, who has never been in debt, and put her into debt to the point where she'll have to probably declare bankruptcy.

In the end, my step-father has ruined my family. He's taken my mother away from me, from my sister, from her mother, and everyone in her family. He came in and re-arranged everyone's lives and traditions because of his control freakness.

...and I don't know how to handle it.

This past week (Nothing interesting)

2008-03-01T16:49:00.001-08:00

actually went by kind of quickly. To go off on a tangent almost immediately, it is nice to put most of my political stuff in the Tumblog (to the right), so that this isn't 20 political articles then one about my life.

I've spent the week doing research for school, classes, writing a little bit, reading some comics, and scanning in documents at work. Its been a pretty chill, even if boring week. Kind of a bummer I had to work this morning though because I had to decline invitations from both Nickie and Sean T. last night. As far as I know, Sean T. is supposed to call me tonight though.

I missed the deadline to pre-register for the bar exam here in IL. I figure though that $100 is worth more to me now than $400 will be then anyway. Furthermore, what if I don't practice in Illinois.

People who say they miss you, miss talking to you, etc... and then don't respond to your attempts at keeping in touch are incredibly frustrating to me.

In other news, if you didn't know, I converted to Catholicism last fall. This no meat on Fridays in Lent actually kind of does suck.

I'm excited for spring so I can do some HDR photography.

I've started being stricter on my diet as well as working out. Hope it lasts a decent amount of time.

...I came for the drinks...but I stayed for the love.

Everyone, look up and listen to William Elliot Whitmore, or you aren't my friend anymore.

Train ride

2008-02-25T22:24:00.001-08:00

Today, tonight rather, a very drunk and possibly narcotic using young man boarded the train and sat in front of me. He promptly passed out. When the conductor, who happens to be a sweet old man on the 9:40 train, came by and asked for a ticket. The guy mumbled about circles. The conductor told him to look for it and he'd come back. When he came back, still no ticket. After some time, the conductor asked him, after waking him, where he was going. He just pointed and he mumbled "same place." At one point the conductor started teasing him, telling him he had passed where he was going, as we had elucidated that he was going to LaGrange, and we were already 10 miles past there. He refused to get off (regardless of the fact he was riding for free). The woman across from him tried clarifying his predicament for him. His only response was, "Don't you think I know that." He then asked where she was getting off. She got up and moved cars, and his prompt response was fucking bitch. It was about this time he realized we were laughing at him. He stood up and called me a fag, the man behind me an asshole, and the rest of them "them fucking people." Oh yes, the conductor was a troll. He sat back down, and I got up and waited near the doors, as I only had 3 stops to go and didn't want to listen to him.

He followed me into the door area. He had a sixer of beer, busch light, if you can call that beer. There was obviously a broken bottle in the carrier.

I was told that if I "put his shit in peril, I will kill you."

I ignored this. I simply stared out the window.

He then screamed "Nothing, nothing." "Is that all you have, nothing?"

I said, "I'm sorry, I don't know what you're talking about sir."

He responded with, "Mumble mumble, you're an intellectual, look at you, NOTHING."

"I'm sorry?"

"Ignorance will get you far huh?"

"Sir, I don't appreciate your insulting me." (I've never been so polite about this shit that I can think of in my life)

"Your stupid fucking face is going to get you far, huh?"

"You're a God damn drunk impotent dolt that missed his stop because you can't hold your fucking liquor, and its nasty ass Busch Light asshole. And I'm the ignorant asshole riding the train home from law school. Fuck off and die you cunt."

He then shoved me and I threw his sixer to the ground, and railroad police promptly escorted him off at the next stop. The problem was it was the Downers Grove stop. My stop. Luckily, the drunk asshole fell, was throwing a fit, and the Railroad Police called the real police.

I helped an old lady clean the snow off her car.

Yes, I say fuck a lot. I'm working on it.

23 years...

2008-02-24T22:17:00.001-08:00

Well, on Wednesday, I made it a self-record twenty-three years of continuous living without dying.

The weekend before, my mother and stepfather came up. My mother brought me a very decent knife set and a juicer. Both are incredibly awesome. Work was work, and school was school. However, Contracts on Thursday evening got canceled, so I laid around and watched movies, rather than do something productive.

Next - Not as bad as I thought it would be. Nicholas Cage can see two minutes into his own future. Is forced to fight crime. Jessica Biel looks beautiful as per usual.
John Rambo - Sylvester Stallone in the fourth Rambo movie. Not much plot, lots of death. Same amounts as Rambo II, only more gruesome.

This week after class was over on Friday, some classmates and I went out for a few drinks. We started a little club if you will. These folks are really the only people from law school I hang out with.

On Saturday and Sunday, I visited some friends from Bradley and some family in the greater-Peoria area.

I highly recommend that everyone listen to some William Elliot Whitmore. It is good stuff. http://www.williamelliottwhitmore.com/

Chip on my shoulder

2008-02-03T19:18:00.001-08:00

...I know I have a chip on my shoulder. Well one one each. Helps keep me balanced out. One of them is this superiority complex about my Chemistry major that I had. It was quite difficult. Sometimes people complain to me, or tell me that they are having a tough time, or they don't enjoy the major they have because of how tough it is, and how much work, and I almost spit my scotch all over my laptop.

I know I'm a jerk. My friends who had education majors already know about this. As anyone who knows me would know, I wouldn't keep my opinion to myself. My friends in political science majors also get no sympathy. I took the same courses they did, while taking quantum mechanics, and fail to see where the challenge in their major lay.

I wonder why I am this way sometimes, but most of the time when I'm being good about biting my tongue, I figure that is a good enough start. Considering America is falling behind the rest of the world in things that matter, mathematics, the sciences (not psuedosciences like psych) and engineering, I suppose I have a reason to be upset when people with majors that don't make us competitive with the rest of the world complain. Anyway's, biting my tongue... its a running start for me.

*** - - - ***

In other news, if any attractive and or intelligent women would like to go to the Chicago Symphony Orchestra with me on Feb. 19th, let me know.

John Edwards

2008-01-30T20:46:00.001-08:00

I know I have been an Obama supporter. I vastly prefer him over Mrs. Clinton. All Clinton had going for me was her former fight for healthcare (but then she abandoned it) and her husband (who as an attack dog for her is losing my respect).

I've always liked Edwards. His climb from modest means to who he is today is a great story. More importantly, his constant focus on poverty really drew me in.

So why Obama? Simple. Change. Charisma. The man, as he is starting to claim, is our generations JFK. I believe he can unite. All along everyone has had to know that Edwards just wouldn't make it. I wouldn't want anyone less as a Vice-President though. Hopefully, he can make it there, then maybe make it into the presidency from there. Not likely, that how things used to be, but its rarer these days.

My only complaint is there are no pro-life Dems. If there were, they'd have the race, every race against Republicans, hands down.

Update on my educational situation

2008-01-30T14:39:00.001-08:00

To be honest law school is not that hard. It certainly has its busy work and its reading, but it breaks down into rules.

Lots and lots of rules. Others in my class with lesser majors (as determined by my self-created hierarchy of undergraduate majors) do seem to think it is hard. I don't think they are used to breaking big things down into small parts and applying them to a different bigger problem. I'm glad chemistry and the sciences taught me this skill. Furthermore, taking Constitutional Law and Judicial Politics as an undergrad gave me a head start. Many of my classmates didn't realize that Civil Rights Act litigation all takes place in Federal courts. Hell, they knew it was a federal statute, and didn't realize you litigate a federal statute in a federal court, not the state court in which you live. I was surprised. I would like to think I learned that in High School as well as Undergrad, but I don't know.

I have learned what I can sue people for as far as injuries not concerning contracts or criminal laws go. I have learned how to make and sue over a contract. I'm learning the steps of suing some one, not for criminal offenses. And I am learning how to write as a lawyer. In the end, I should have more pages published (Mostly by West Co. Publishing) than many prolific authors. Maybe I should claim to be a writer, not an attorney?

I made Dean's List. I'm on track to make Law Review. I'm excited about those things.

Redesign

2008-01-29T22:44:00.000-08:00

I'm not sure that anyone really reads this, but I've gone with a different template for the sake of the three columns.

IN FACT, IF YOU DO READ THIS, LEAVE A COMMENT W/ YOUR NAME if you would.

Now, there is a Flickr box for my photography, a Tumblr feed for my random internet finds (So I'm not tempted to just post random stuff as a whole entry), and my twitter feed. Kind of pulling it all together in one place I suppose.

I hope all are well.

Chair_by_wobblyheadedjon

2008-01-28T17:19:00.001-08:00

Chair_by_wobblyheadedjon
Originally uploaded by wobblyheadedjon

...

2008-01-19T00:36:00.001-08:00

My great-grandfather is 93. He doesn't care if he lives or dies. He doesn't enjoy life. All these are excusable for a man of his age. I just wish he would try to. I'm debating getting him Tuesday's with Morrie, but it a way it seems a little mean to get an old man a book about an old man dying. Even though I think it would help him.

My sister isn't being cared for like she should be. She has free healthcare, and my mother and her current husband won't get her the help she needs.

My grandmother and grandfather both have to have check ups on various possible cancers.

My mother has had a major heart problem, stress and anxiety problems, doesn't take care of her health problems, is in an abusive relationship, and I believe, perhaps incorrectly, depressed.

I am up here, with a handful of friends that I see less and less. They are getting married and have less time, understandably, to hang out with me. I'm burning bridges with another friend who never much treated me or her other friends up here well when we moved up here. Surprisingly, I did that on accident. A girl that I thought so highly of and invested a lot of myself into has mostly cut me out of her life, inexplicably by my counts. Especially when she goes to school <10 minutes away. In a way it was liberating. I am probably losing a friend, but in the end I have been able to look at other girls. Problem is, none look back. There was one girl, I thought, maybe. I am pretty sure she only digs guys with beards and who are actually in Central, Illinois.

I think I've done too many stupid bad things and have a bad enough track record to scare away the nice girls I like.

I've cleaned up too much for the not nice girls I like.

The rest are just plain out of my league.

People say: Lonely? Go hang out with people. Am I the only person who can be in a crowd of people and still feel lonely? Other friends invite me to go out with them and a half dozen complete strangers. See the above question and raise it a level of awkwardness as well.

...

I'm not a good great-grandson, grandson, son, brother, or friend. Because of this I've been drinking too much, depressed, and lacking motivation. I am too down to even get angry enough to use it to motivate myself. I've always joked about it, but sadly the only motivation in my life is a six figure income in 3 years. Frankly, that makes me even more pissed with myself.

Most People

2008-01-15T19:22:00.001-08:00

set standards for themselves. Say that they stand for something. They won't do this, they will do that. Actions or inactions for set times, or forever. They all give up on it. Every. Single. One.

I don't understand

2008-01-09T14:08:00.001-08:00

why someone would wear a vest with a three button suit. Unless I suppose you are a man who doesn't have the sense to keep your suit properly buttoned.

I however, will not ponder this in the manner I usually would. Why? Because I have a nice Gurkha cigar (never had before this one, but it is pretty good, an easy light, and a great price) and a white russian. Life is taking the back burner for a bit.

For dinner, pasta with vodka creme sauce.

I overestimate some...

2008-01-08T16:02:00.001-08:00

I have a friend. I always thought she was so tough and stuck to her guns and tried to live a life she preached. And man, onto that soap box she can climb. I had a great amount of respect for her in that regard. Her overuse of song lyrics as her own thoughts were excusable, as many girls do this. (I prefer quotes, they seem a bit more acceptable than the words of teen angst written by almost 30 y.o. men)

The more I know, the less I respect her. Not that I don't respect her. Life is hard and we all mess up. However, she messes up a lot. It wouldn't even bother me if I hadn't placed her on this tough girl who speaks her mind pedestal. She's the same as she always was, but she's fallen from the imaginary height I put her at, and in that, I've disappointed myself more than she has disappointed me.

New Photographs

2008-01-01T17:55:00.001-08:00

Taken around central Illinois, for more see my Deviant Art page

I am...

2008-01-01T12:53:00.001-08:00

so sick of being alone. I like it better when I'm in class and I am able to keep busy. I sit. I go outside and walk, and take pictures that never really come out. I simply exist. Alone.

AMAZING Drumming

2007-12-29T13:38:00.001-08:00

Christmas

2007-12-27T20:08:00.001-08:00

Christmas went well. No holiday-eve fights at bars, although my family was out untill 1AM on Christmas eve, at a bar.

Some of my family is on very, VERY tight budgets. The one thing that has always made me worry more than anything is money. My grandparents live check to check, and have to work jobs as seniors in order to be able to afford anything beyond pay for bills and eat meagerly. My mother and step-father I believe are also having money troubles, but I feel it may just be a tight budget time as they adjust to having a mortgage and the such. All of it makes me feel very bad. I don't know, anytime I've heard anyone in my family having a tough time with money, I just start to cry. As I said before, stress from money is the only thing that really gets to me, and I can't stand to see my family live a very hard life.

especially when it used to be my grandmother who always made the decent living, and she would spoil us with presents as children. Now she gives me $25 and I feel bad for taking it. Like, I want to cry because of it.

When I make money, I will take care of them. They will not have to worry about money. I will also help my sister out with school expenses.

However, my family has proceeded to crack me up with presents. I asked for highlighters of certain colors in packs, and my mother got me the 5 colors in one pack, and said she had to look at 5 stores to find that combination. I won't lie, I honestly figured they would just give me whatever they found.

A Week of Shootings

2007-12-11T07:13:00.001-08:00

This week has been filled with news of shootings. We had nine people killed in the Nebraska shopping mall, seven people killed in two separate shootings at Colorado religious establishments, and even a fight breaking out that turned into a shooting match at a Columbus mall. Not very festive news for the most festive time of the year.

All this has had me thinking about the FISA debate when proponents of the warrantless wiretapping were quick to argue it was necessary to give up freedoms for security. Would these same people apply that argument to the second amendment instead of the fourth? I think we all know the answer on that. Perhaps the next time a Republican Senator says that we should give up freedoms for security when it comes to listening in on phone calls, then he should be asked about giving up the right to bear arms as a way to protect us in church or at the local mall. Let’s see how quickly the subject changes then.

from:
http://www.crooksandliars.com/2007/12/10/a-week-of-shootings/

Life as of late...

2007-12-05T16:02:00.001-08:00

Well, "Black Friday" at work sucked.

Classes have been wrapping up.

That means exams, aka 100% of my course grades are coming up. I'm having a pretty ehhhh time with that. Very ehh in fact.

That is all folks. Sorry, not very interesting. Check back after Dec. 19th.

Church Incident

2007-11-19T18:34:00.001-08:00

I was looking around the Church.  I was sitting far back enough so that the most of the mass was lost in the high, painted ceiling, among the cherubs and the gold leafing.  The people around me were looking for God.  There was one man reciting Hail Mary's, one after the other, not listening to the words he was saying.  One woman was sitting there, weeping quietly.  One or two were asleep.
They would never find God.  There was only one way to find God, I knew, and that was to be looking for him out of the corner of your eye…
"Aha!" I yelled, standing up, turning around and pointing…  Pointing at a man with a dirty mop in hand, and an overbite.  One of the sleepers had roused.  The priest at the front didn't miss a beat.  "Sorry." I told the janitor.  "I thought you were someone else."
--
The janitor watched the embarrassed man walk out quickly.
"That was too close." He said as he started scrubbing the tiles.

From Ladygekko on Deviant Art

In other news...I'm not happy.

Life

2007-11-12T22:18:00.001-08:00

is not treating me the best. I've not felt this bummed for this long in quite some time. Its incredibly frustrating to be in such a funk. I don't wallow in it, thats the worst part. I try to do stuff, to hang with people. Usually it fails. It always does with one person and it seems like it usually does with others as well.

Yeah, so, school is gearing up for the big tests, in fact the only tests, of the whole year. I'm keeping up with school work, but having a hard time buckling down like I should to get everything done like it should be.

Sigh.

Pictures:

This has become my life...

2007-10-23T12:46:00.000-07:00

I did buy a Canon Rebel XT though.

Stoke.

Today I was driving

2007-10-19T12:37:00.001-07:00

and a leaf that was floating in the wind caught my eye. It was about a block away. I watched the leaf for what seemed like 5 minutes, it was really probably 4 seconds. Then it smacked into my windshield. I feel like I took its wings from it.

The Geneva what?

2007-10-10T20:17:00.003-07:00

The Geneva Convention. You know...it bans torture.

I've long believed that in my country's "War Against Terror" that we are truly losing more than we are gaining. First the good opinion and goodwill towards us which we had built up and the event of 9-11 gave us. Then personal liberties and freedoms (which is why they hate us right G.W.?). Now we take away basic human rights of those who oppose our occupation of their country with arms. War is war, but it is not taking away human rights.

"The United States tortures prisoners of war in violation of international law, former President Jimmy Carter said on Wednesday. "I don't think it, I know it." he told CNN.

In our longstanding run to make the U.S.A. look like a hypocritical, war-mongering, half-ass empire building nation, we are doing a hell of a job. I guess some people believe that's what we were meant to do. I don't. I don't think the founding fathers did either.

Lonely

2007-10-10T20:17:00.001-07:00

I'm getting more and more so...

I have been using my Supersampler with some B&W film. I do not expect this experiment to go well, but we'll see.

Desiderata

2007-10-09T20:24:00.000-07:00

This is probably one of the most important things I've ever had read to me.
I share...

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.

All the lonely people...where do they all come from...

2007-10-07T22:57:00.001-07:00

I went to my first RCIA class this Sunday. I was a little surprised. It was much more of an extension of the mass and less of a class. I think I may be the only new guy, as all the rest were old people there, whom I believe were there just to further their faith.

Just a quick political type rant...

I read about Blackwater, and how ripples are going to come through the "industry" now.

So what. What industry? Mercenaries. That's what. Soldiers of Fortune.

This is crap. Throw the book at them.

Ashamed

2007-09-30T18:52:00.001-07:00

I drank entirely too much. Like, almost ending up in the hospital and having cops check on me to be sure I am alive. That in itself is dumb and irresponsible of me.

What I mostly feel bad about though is the position I had put my friends in (I assume). I am lucky I have people that care as much as they do.

One of the reasons I like Law School

2007-09-24T13:51:00.000-07:00

An email from a professor...

Mon, 9/24/2007 10:10 AM CDT

As we discussed in class last week, I will be buying a round for those of you interested in getting drinks after class on Friday, September 28. If your section has a favorite bar, we can go there, or I can choose one near the school.

A Case brief of my life:

2007-09-20T20:47:00.001-07:00

Facts: Work 8 - 2:30 on weekdays as what amounts to a laborer. Drive home, shower as quickly as possible. Time - 3:05 pm. Cook something very quickly/eat left overs or a sandwich. Time - 3:25 pm. Ride bike or walk to train station. Time 3:35 pm. Relax for 10 minutes. Get on train. Read for class/do homework. Arrive in Chicago. Walk against the flow of humanity headed home to their homes and family. Walk for about 10 minutes, go to the DePaul Law Library to continue reading/doing homework. Class from 5:50 pm - anywhere between 7:30 and 8:30 pm. Reverse process to the point of getting home. Time: 9:35pm. Cook something so I have left overs (even though I don't eat any of it) for the next day. Sleep. Repeat.

On lucky days I get to see Molly (Mondays) or hang out with other friends (Fridays).

Occasionally I get a day off of work and on those days I clean my apartment.

Procedural Posture - 22 years of schooling from Preschool thru a B.Science in Chemistry.

Issue: What the fuck am I doing?

Reasoning: The school part is not that bad. The current work/school routine is grinding. The profits from this venture are expected to make it worth it.

Holding: The continuing of this course is affirmed

On the current state of my sports...

2007-09-17T21:20:00.001-07:00

St. Louis Cardinals - falling apart.

Miami Dolphins - Not a good start, but good potential for a 8 or 9 game season if they pull it together.

Chicago Fire - Will make playoffs, on the upswing. Blanco has done a helluva job.

Man Utd. - Domination will occur.

USA Soccer - Damn good showing against Brasil. The score line didn't reflect the quality of play for the U.S.

Best your mama joke ever...

2007-09-17T21:16:00.001-07:00

Photos

2007-09-10T16:37:00.001-07:00

Taken around Chicago using a Canon AE-1 (ancient) with Kodak B&W 400 CN film.

for more, go to

http://wobblyheadedjon.deviantart.com

Contract Law

2007-09-06T17:31:00.001-07:00

This guy might be the best devils advocate I've ever heard. He is quite the evil bastard. He turned one of my arguments into something about a brothel. Other people he just stared at and moved on. I don't know that he's agreed with anything someone has said.

Mostly he just will tell you that doesn't make sense. It doesn't necessarily follow at all.

As a Cardinals Fan

2007-09-04T20:42:00.001-07:00

It is my duty to make fun of, slander, and libel anything and everything Cub related. Thusly, here is an excerpt from a recent conversation with a Cubs fan:

"(10:36:32 PM) wobblyheadedjon: holy fuck...you guys are paying someone 91 million dollars that is 0-5, has an ERA >9 over the past five games
(10:36:59 PM) wobblyheadedjon: ...you wonder why unicorns are more prevalent than world series games played @ Wrigley."

In other sports news...
USA v. Brasil here in Chicago, and I'm not going in case my great grandpa's surgery goes south. I know I'm an asshole, but why couldn't it just have been on a Sunday?

Week 1 of NFL season. Dolphins better pull together at least a 8 game season. they have a lot of rookies and its a rebuilding year, but they have the most solid (Yes Bear's fans) the most solid defense out there. If the offensive line can hold it together, we can have a decent year. Playoffs? maaayyyyybe.

I was reading an interview

2007-09-03T20:50:00.001-07:00

done by a guy who plays some sissy-core type stuff. more into stuff like fall out boy and the such. He hit the nail on the head with this though...
"slayer is the gold standard against which every band is measured.
they are the pinnacle.
they are the band your parents pray that you never become a fan of.
they are the planet eating unicron.
and as scott ian from anthrax once said, "slayer is what hell sounds like."

You're crashing, but you're no wave...

2007-09-03T18:17:00.001-07:00

Thursday: Stuck car, tow truck, lunch with Molly, traffic, construction, traffic, Int. 88 traffic/construction. Miss train by 5 minutes. Int. 290 traffic. Spaz out and get off the interstate. Motorcycle accident. Hour late for class at this point, so fuck it and go home.

This was a pretty good weekend. Not as productive as I would have hope, but still good all in all. Friday night, my Legal Writing assignment was bounced. This means there was an error in formatting and I would lose 20% of my grade and had to return it the next day (Saturday). This was over the fact that when I wrote my ID# on the back I wrote "ID# XXXXXXX" rather than "XXXXXXX." Anal, yes. Necessary, I've read about judges that dismiss cases because of the wrong margins on briefs, so I guess it will teach me a lesson. This assignment wasn't graded anyway, so it doesn't really matter.

Saturday, what did I do? I woke up late. I had lunch with my friend Sean T. Madden. Bike ride, FIFA 07, the typcial.

Sunday. Went to mass. I went kayaking with Scott and Colleen. Out to eat and rented The Fracture (grade: B). It is a pretty good movie.

Scott is thinking about buying two kayaks, I hope he does. That stuff is a helluva upper body work out and fun.

Fall Out Boy is ruining my life. They are too fucking catchy.

The current lifestyle modifications are:
Spend Less
Humble thyself

Its Labor Day

2007-09-03T09:25:00.001-07:00

and what is on my agenda. Fun, exciting things you may think.

But no, I will read court cases focusing on torts and contracts. To spice it up a bit, I will do the laundry.

Disappointments are to the soul...

2007-08-26T01:39:00.001-07:00

...what the thunderstorms are to the air.
Friedrich von Schiller

Yeah, so drove to Peoria this morning to see some family and especially my great grandfather. Had evening plans for hanging out and some going out w/ Peoria/Bradley friends. It all fell through. Every.Single.Detail. By 1 am, I had no one to go out with, nor a place to crash.

It was nice to see some people during the day though. And me and my mother are making good progress on getting along, accepting her faults, and just trying to be a son and her a mother. It is nice. More than nice.

I got to give Allison her little present. I love giving gifts. She reacted well and I think she'll really enjoy it. So, that was good.

I also now have a Sam Adams specially crafted glass. I love it. MMmmm beer.

An update tomorrow on the past week.

One step forward, two steps back.

2007-08-22T12:03:00.001-07:00

From CNN:

U.S. officials rethink hopes for Iraq democracy(link)

Nightmarish political realities in Baghdad are prompting American officials to curb their vision for democracy in Iraq. Instead, the officials now say they are willing to settle for a government that functions and can bring security.

Uhhh...is that not what they had before? Only you know, with an infrastructure, not a bunch of dead relatives and friends, etc...?

Fuck. I believe I called this when I was in High School.

Love eachother or perish

2007-08-21T16:14:00.001-07:00

Someone famous said that. If you know who, good for you. If you don't, read.

Anywho, check this out. For every pair of shoes you buy, this guy donates a pair to those who need them. If more businesses were built on this model, oh man.

http://www.tomsshoes.com

Give me the flowers while I'm living...

2007-08-21T16:08:00.001-07:00

Well, the Air and Water show on the lake was probably going to be crappy due to inclement weather, and the fact it was the Thunderbirds and not blue angels, so I went to a block party on the south side instead. It was a good time and the cops were called. Pretty awesome.

Had a typical evening with Molly the other day. Studying/eating/talking. Hopefully it will keep happening.

Brasil v. USA, Mens Soccer on September 9th. I was all geared up to go. Including wiggling my way into the presale, but right before I was going to buy the tickets on Thursday morning, I received a call and my great grandfather is going to have some kind of routine procedure at the hospital. Nothing is routing for a 93 year old though, so I decided against attending the game. The idea of getting a call and having to leave Soldier Field and go straight to Peoria is pretty silly. Thusly, I will go somewhere and watch the game, maybe even in Peoria, thusly if something happens I can be there if things go awry.

but seriously...damn.

in other sports news, the Cards are only three games down. Oh yeah. And the only reason the Cubs are in first is because the Cards swept the Brewers. We all know that in the end the cards will have the division, because the Cubs are useless, and the Cards always come back at the end of the season.

Gotta couple of roles of film in for developing now. FINALLY. I want to see some of my photos.

I managed to spend only 200 on books for this semester. I've already read 70 pages of the densest non-science related stuff ever.

TCF Bank. Opinions Chicagolanders????

Classes start Thursday night. Holy crap.

Act nice and gentle

2007-08-17T19:52:00.001-07:00

Just a few things.

Finding a part time job is a lot harder than I assumed it would be. I believe its mainly because I can't work nights. Hopefully something pans out really soon though.

For the past few weeks, I've listened to nothing but the blues, and damn its wonderful.

Finally, Superbad is hilarious. At least 129% as funny as Knocked Up.

O, Homem do Ano. (Man of the Year)

2007-08-16T09:12:00.001-07:00

I just watched this movie. It is quite good. The Brasilian cinema that makes it to the States does tend to be excellent. Makes me wonder how much I'm missing out on as far as film goes.

Its a movie about the descent of a man who starts by killing one man who was a gangster in a fit of rage, and quickly becomes a vigilante with the support of the community and even police.

It also has the underlying theme the same of City of God. That the lower classes violence is acceptable in Brasil because the rich can afford to stay well away from it. In this instance it doesn't happen in the actual slums such as the Cidade de Deus but does make show that the class divides are rigid, and even though this man is doing the bidding and is useful to the rich, he'll never be accepted into the higher parts of society.

The film is distributed by film movement. A great company i just learned about that makes it a point to distribute independent and foreign films.

In summary, it is a great movie. A tale of decent into being more and more crazed and violent all at the approval of the surroundings. As the box says from a no-one to hero outlaw in less than twenty-four hours.

4/5 Action - Foreign - Crime

When it rains, it pours...

2007-08-15T21:22:00.001-07:00

You know, that slogan is for Morton salt. It has nothing to do with the idea that if it is raining, it is raining very hard. It is just that even though its moist out, Morton salt does not clump up.

I left my windows cracked and moon roof open. Again.

It rained.

Again.

I'm about sick of doing this to myself over and over.

I've had phone calls the past two nights that make me feel good that I'm I am the person to be called.

I'm enrolling in RCIA. That is that.

Sighs, Leers, and Crocodile Tears

2007-08-15T11:07:00.000-07:00

Well, this is the first post in this Blogger shindig. I had a livejournal but I really just don't care for the site all that much.

A kid from my Alma Mater died in a house fire in a horribly idiotic prank gone awry involving him sleeping and others shooting roman candles and running out of the house while he died in the ensuing fire. I don't really feel anything about it. I feel more bad that I don't care that he died. I knew very little about him. What I do know are not things that I would attribute to him being a good person.

...I didn't know him. I don't know the hundreds of sub-Saharan Africans that have probably died today too. Thusly I will care about his death as much as most people care about the African's deaths. Not at all.